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August 25, 2013

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Wedding Tipping Guidelines from Phoenix Wedding PlannerKim Horn, MBC

Wedding Tipping Guidelines from Phoenix Wedding Planner Kim Horn, MBC

Your RSVPs are in (finally), and you’re three weeks from your wedding day!  As your wedding planner, this is the time to have all your details wrapped up.  Relax and enjoy quality time with your family and friends prior to your wedding day!

One of the questions I get asked as things wind down is, “Who and how much should I tip?”  With all the details, many seem to overlook the important task (and etiquette) of tipping.

Below is my go-to guide on tipping, so you show your wedding vendors, who put your wedding together, your appreciation for making your wedding day amazing.  Tipping isn’t required, unless a service charge is spelled out in your contract.  Tipping is a voluntary and customary expression of appreciation for exceptional service.

The golden rule is to check your vendor list to make sure you don’t forget someone.

Tipping Guidelines

1). Use the guidelines below, and write a check or place cash into an envelope with their name on the outside of the envelope.  Always carry additional cash and bring your check book for possibility of overtime charges or other incidentals.

2). Personalize a thank-you note to the vendors with a few details on how they helped you throughout the planning process.

3). Give your wedding planner all the envelopes at your wedding rehearsal.  The wedding planner will discreetly pass out your envelopes to your vendors.

VENDOR SUGGESTED TIP PROTOCOL HELPFUL HINT
BAND/DJ Musicians $20-$50 each; Band leader $100-$250; DJ $50 – $200 Optional, yet majority do tip. Need # of Band Members
BARTENDER $20-$25 per bartender Expected, check contract. Need # of Bartenders and if they are assigned exclusive to your wedding.
BELLMAN $10 – $20 each Expected, check contract. Moving your gifts.
CATERING MANAGER $200 – $500 Optional, yet majority do tip.
CHEF $150 – $200 Optional, yet majority do tip, especially if designed a special menu for you.
FLORISTS Depends on contract. Optional, depends on if they already charge you for delivery, setup, strike, and moving sets.
GIFT BAG DELIVERY Avg. of $2 – $3 per bag for bellman to deliver to room. Expected, check contract. Names on bags help bellman identify bag(s) per room or guest.
HAIRSTYLIST/MAKEUP ARTIST/NAIL TECH 15%-20% of total bill Expected Let your wedding party know you are handling the tip so they aren’t tipped twice.
HEAD CAPTAIN or BANQUET CAPTAIN $1 – $5 per guest Expected, check your contract to see service charge fee, then find out how much of service charge goes to staff vs. catering company or resort vs. staff. Try to get multiple events with the same captain.
OFFICIANT If member of church, donate $500+ to church,; Non-denominational $50-$100 depending on fee they charge. Expected
PHOTOGRAPHER $50-$200 each Optional
SERVING STAFF 15%-25% (Normally in Contract, yet Servers don’t receive all of this) Optional, based on contract. Need # of servers, and see if Head Capt. Could dispurse.
TRANSPORTATION 15% – 20% (Normally % is stated in contract) Expected, yet check contract to make sure it isn’t already included in fee. Find out qty.  and names of drivers.
VALET $1-$2 per car Expected, yet check contract. Let your guests know if you are tipping so they aren’t tipped twice.
VIDEOGRAPHER $50-$200 each Optional Need # of manned cameras.
WEDDING PLANNER $200 – $500, depends on how much $, time, and stress they saved you Optional, yet majority do tip. Will your lead wedding planner be at your wedding or an assistant?

 

Copyright 2013, Kim Horn, MBC™

Hire Kim as your wedding planner, call 480.921.7891 or text your name, wedding date, and wedding planner request to 602.418.9089.

Kim M. Horn, MBC™

Master Bridal Consultant | 1 of 61 in the World

Scottsdale Wedding Planner | Paradise Valley Wedding Planner | Chandler Wedding Planner | Phoenix Wedding Planner | Destination Weddings

Publisher | Pres. | ArizonaBridalSource.com

AZ State Coordinator Assoc. of Bridal Consultants May 2003 – May 2012

2010 Annual Conference Chair (worked with David Tutera) – Assoc. of Bridal Consultants

O 480.921.7891

M 602.418.9089

F 480.829.6292

E info@ArizonaBridalSource.com

ArizonaBridalSource.com

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August 2, 2013

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Thanks to JanDekkerDesigns.com for the gorgeous photo!  Few vendors ROCK my world like Jan, plus her b’day is one day before mine, go figure, right!

http://www.JanDekkerDesigns.com

http://www.JanDekkerDesigns.com

You found the man/woman of your dreams, your soul mate, right, congrats!  You said “YES”, you’re engaged, and since many items do come in “threes,” or “multiples of threes,”– such as graduating from college, moving into a new home, switching jobs, finding a new job, buying a new car, and then you just added the “wedding to do list” which is a mile long, you are BUSY!  You thought finding time to do things was tough before, well, it doesn’t get any better!

As an experienced wedding planner, at the end of the day, in my opinion (which you will hear TONS of opinions), this is truly what matters…having an incredible wedding of your dreams is important, yet more important is the quality of the rest of your life together as husband and wife.

Your wedding may be the first “party” you have thrown with all of your family and friends in attendance.  To make it more stressful, it is not only your family and friends, you have added the family and friends of your fiancé too (many you may not have met yet)!

The golden rule is important.  You have heard of bridezilla, groomzilla, and momzilla, so please don’t let the stress of planning your wedding turn you, or someone you love into one!  Reach out to those in your close circle of family and friends in a kind way.  You may disagree, tempers may flare, yet pick your battles, since relationships and friendships may end over minor issues which may have been solved easily and quickly.

Here are a few MUST DO tips before you walk down the aisle and say “I do.”

1).  Happily ever after happens in fairy tales.  Pre-wedding anxiety is normal.  Confront your fears, stress, or concerns about your marriage head on.  Be open with your fiance and your inner circle of family and friends.

2).  Plan a date night with your fiance.  Have a date night with your fiancé where you talk about what he wants to talk about, and don’t bring up “the wedding.”  Make it at a location on “neutral grounds,” where you both are comfortable and get back to “normal” before the stresses of planning the wedding.

3).  Discuss a prenup, checking accounts, credit cards, savings, and joining finances.  If you haven’t already discussed this, it is important.  You may want accounts to stay at “your bank,” while he wants accounts to stay at “his bank”.   Once checks and bills start coming in, you don’t want confusion about whose account they should go into or out of.  Are you going to stay with “your” bank, switch to “his” bank, or go to a different bank altogether?  Finances are normally one of the top items of disagreements in relationships.

4).  Discuss plans to have children or not have children.  Many breakdowns in marriages occur when someone “thought” or “assumed” their spouse wanted and expected something, then when they brought it up, said they were “blind sided” and didn’t see “that” coming.  If you are planning to have children, when, and how many?  If you are not planning on having children, best to talk about it now.  If you do have children, how are you going to raise them if you are Catholic and he is Jewish?

5).  Plan “me” time.  Schedule something which helps you relax, and something you like to do for you.  May be working out, hiking, playing sports, purging your closet, something for you!

6).  Bond and have heart-to-heart moments with your family and BFFs.  Once you are married you will have less free time with your parents and friends.  Plan something you have always wanted to do with them, yet haven’t done “yet” together, something on your/their “bucket” list.

7).  Talk about “When we’re married…”  Here is a way to get the creative minds thinking (LOVE using this in your wedding ceremony wording too):  You have known each other for ____ years, through the first glance of acquaintance to this moment of commitment.  At some moment you decided to marry.  From that moment of yes, until this moment of Yes (your wedding vows), indeed, you have been making promises and agreements in an informal way.  All those conversations that were held riding in a car or over a meal or on long walks – all those sentences that began with “When we’re married” and continued with “I will, and you will, and we will,” – those late night talks that included “someday” and “somehow” and “maybe” – and all those promises that are unspoken matters of the heart.  All these common things, and more, are the real process of a wedding.

8).  You can’t change someone else.  This is one of the most valuable lessons I will ever share with you.  So many clients say “after the wedding, this isn’t happening…”and feel they have a magical way of changing their spouse.  When your vows say, “for better, for worse,” that is truly what to expect.  You love your fiancé for multiple reasons, and will be spending the rest of your lives together.  Marriage is a two way street, and communication and compromise are crucial to the success of your marriage.

9).  If you don’t like something, work at making a change in yourself to change the way you accept or don’t accept “it” in your life.  The definition of insanity by Albert Einstein is “Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different results.”

Copyright 2013, Kim Horn, MBC™

Hire Kim as your wedding planner, call 480.921.7891 or text your name, wedding date, and wedding planner request to 602.418.9089.

Kim M. Horn, MBC™

Master Bridal Consultant | 1 of 61 in the World

Scottsdale Wedding Planner | Paradise Valley Wedding Planner | Chandler Wedding Planner | Phoenix Wedding Planner | Destination Weddings

Publisher | Pres. | ArizonaBridalSource.com

AZ State Coordinator Assoc. of Bridal Consultants May 2003 – May 2012

2010 Annual Conference Chair (worked with David Tutera) – Assoc. of Bridal Consultants

O 480.921.7891

M 602.418.9089

F 480.829.6292

E info@ArizonaBridalSource.com

ArizonaBridalSource.com

 

 

 

 

 

 

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May 12, 2012

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Alexa and I at Turks and Caicos at Beaches, best vacation ever!

Alexa and I at Turks and Caicos at Beaches, best vacation ever!

Happy Mother’s Day to you if you are a mom.

Happy early Father’s Day if you are a dad.

If you aren’t a parent, then please pass on love, hugs, and best wishes to your parents and grandparents!  If you don’t have a mom, or grandparents, I understand your loss, and remember their laughter, smile, and incredible times you had together.

As a parent, you feel fortunate to be able to bring a child into this world.  You understand what it means to want more for your child than you and your spouse ever had.

Before becoming a mom, I used to think life was “busy”.  Now being a mom, and running multiple businesses, have a new definition and balance for the word “busy”.

Being a teacher and positive role model for your child, you hope and pray the map for their road of life is filled with good choices. You have a positive mindset overflowing with strength and energy, especially on the days when there are detours.

When you are a parent you understand 24/7, you understand there is no time off, and traditions you pass on and implement will be passed on to your child’s children.

You want to be there to share great experiences and all those “firsts”.  You want to listen to everything about their day.  You want to give them hugs, dry their tears, and pick them up when they fall.  You understand one day when when you least expect it, they will be on their own.  You hope and pray you have instilled in them the knowledge, tools, and ability to make their own right choices as if you were there beside them as they follow their road of life.  It is hard to know all your parents sacrificed, yet you get a better idea when you become a parent.

When the doctors told me I would never have children, my mom told me “Kim, you will never know what love is”.  At that time I had no idea what she meant, and now after beating all odds to become a parent, I do “get it”!

Blessed that Alexa (our miracle daughter), Steve, and I have an incredible relationship.  We have each others “back”, and together anything is possible!

One of our favorite sayings is “I love you to the moon and back a zillion times, and I love you more than you love me and it is possible!”  Alexa is now 9, and in 9 more years she will be graduating high school and off to college.

My mom passed away almost 19 years ago next month.  Disappointed Alexa and her never met, yet know they have many things in common, which I have discussed with Alexa – their blue eyes, their nose, and their artistic creativity just to name a few of their similarities.

Steve and I celebrate our 22nd anniversary today, and can’t wait for another weekend experience as we are together for Mother’s Day!

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July 14, 2011

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Your upcoming wedding will affect people in your life differently. Many weddings are “all about the bride”, and rarely do you hear much about the FOB (father of the bride), except when another check needs to be written!

Hoping this helps explain your dad’s pre-wedding behavior (why is he suddenly always in the garage?), not to mention his “day of” apparel requests. Communication during stressful times is important.

During your engagement, make time to be with your dad and spend quality “one-on-one” time together. If you sense your dad is getting emotionally distant, ask him to be involved in a part of your wedding you and your mom think he would enjoy. This would be a perfect time to let your dad know that although your relationship may change, no one will take his place. Let him know you look forward to and will treasure this part of your relationship with him. Your dad is working on trusting another man to protect you, which has always been his duty.

With your wedding day around the corner, your dad may feel a sense of loss or feel “his job is over” once you are married. Mothers normally feel an “empty nest” when you leave for college. Yet with fatherhood, this is a major part of his identity, especially since fathers reflect on when you were little, when he taught you things, and remembering how quickly the time has passed.

Verbally walk your dad through your wedding day schedule for the “when and where” of your rehearsal, ceremony, and reception. Let him know the photography timeline, how he will be walking you down the aisle, and his very important line “her mother and I” or “we do” at the ceremony. Remind him of his welcome/toast to everyone and give him a time limit so he knows to be brief. Practice your father/daughter dance together, and ask your wedding planner for assistance if you need help with song selections and choreography.

Copyright 2011
Kim Horn, Master Bridal Consultant (1 of 59 in the World)
Publisher, Arizona Bridal Source
ABC AZ State Coordinator
ABC 2010 Conference Chair worked with David Tutera
O 480.921.7891
C 602.418.9089
E info@ArizonaBridalSource.com
ArizonaBridalSource.com

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September 3, 2009

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With toasts and speeches, the more you have,  the more time you and your guests are “waiting” for something to happen.

Traditionally 3 minutes maximum is great for toasts and speeches, otherwise things may be “too wordy”, and get boring fast.

Will never forget one wedding in April, which was the 3rd wedding I had planned for the three siblings within 5.5 years.  The bride had been in the wedding parties at the previous weddings, but had not been involved in the “wedding day scheduling”.  Never wanting a bride to “settle” on her wedding day, with the bride saying it was a “MUST” for an open microphone.  We had the VIPs go first (five of them), then opened up the microphone with a “sign” between us (knowing she would realize “enough was enough”).  35 minutes later, the bride gave me the “sign” to signal the last toast, and let’s get on to the dinner!  (For safety, had already talked to the head captain at the BEO meeting to make sure the chef was informed to hold the meal – no cold food)!

The rehearsal dinner is a perfect place for an “open microphone”.  Most of your closest family and friends will be there, and it is a fun and loving atmosphere.  Don’t forget to have your wedding photographer and wedding videographer capture your wedding rehearsal dinner toasts and festivities!

“Open microphones” for your wedding day are NOT recommended.  Speeches and toasts  in sequential order, with time limits, work well to keep the flow of your day moving forward (and your food warm too)!

Cutting everyone to 3 minutes maximum will make it easy to have 5 people (taking 15 minutes).  If you allowed those 5 people to have 5 minutes each, you just took 25 minutes away from your evening.  Your choice, but spend and allocate your time wisely.

FOB (also known as the Father of the Bride)

Good idea to have the FOB welcome guests first (after the first dance).  The FOB may go behind where the bride and groom are seated (a great photo opportunity), and may want to take the MOB (Mother of the Bride) with him.  The FOB does not need a glass with champagne, since he will only be welcoming, (not toasting – since this is traditionally the best man’s job).

1).  Thanks the guests for coming from near and far.  May want to mention various states, or countries of key interests to both sides of the family.

2).  Thanks the MOB (mother of the bride) for everything she did for making their family be as incredible as it is.

3).  Reflects on positive aspects of  his relationship with his daughter, watching her grow up, and how incredibly proud he was to walk her down the aisle, or of  when she did “x”, or when he knew the groom was “the one”, etc.

4).  Welcomes the groom into their family, and looking forward to them having many happy years together, excited to see grandchildren, family excursions, etc.

5).  Proposes a welcome to the bride and groom wishing them a future of happiness.

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